Irritability and Sulk

Another behavioral defect that causes people to suffer sorrow is irritability. Irritable people may become offended at any event they witness or anything they hear under the influence of the spiritual state they are in, even though there is no justification for such a reaction.

The words spoken may have nothing to do with them. Or because of their irritability, such people may completely misunderstand what is said to them. Instead of seeing the sense in what is said, they draw totally unwarranted conclusions and use these to fuel their resentment.

Those around them cannot understand why irritable people behave as they do because they seldom say openly what they are vexed about, what is upsetting them. Other bystanders try various methods of working out the problem, but most of the time they cannot figure out why these people have been offended.
One of the reasons for such people's irritability is that they do not regard those around them as friends and do not trust them.

Invariably they interpret others' words and behavior as hostile. Another reason is these people's lack of tranquility and the insincerity inside. Because they are aware of their own unscrupulousness, they think others may notice it and throw it up to them at any moment.

Allah tells us of this characteristic of hypocritical people:
When you see them, their outward form appeals to you, and if they speak you listen to what they say. But they are like propped-up planks of wood. They imagine every cry to be against them. They are the enemy, so beware of them. May Allah destroy them! How they are perverted! (Surat al-Munafiqun: 4)

Some people who do not really take offense deliberately behave as though they did and from this, try to derive an undeserved advantage. By sulking, they want to make the person they are speaking with feel sorry and back down.

Believers do not stoop to such methods. In the morality of the Qur'an, if the other person behaves ignorantly, wrongly or thoughtlessly, there is still no reason for irritability or sulk: A believer knows that every event, every act and every word has been created according to the destiny predetermined by Allah.

Behaving badly in spite of this is a mistake committed against Allah. In addition, the faithful know that tolerant, forgiving and affectionate behavior is necessary for Allah's approval.
Allah indicates the importance of this in the Qur'an:

The repayment of a bad action is one equivalent to it. But if someone pardons and puts things right, his reward is with Allah. Certainly He does not love wrongdoers. (Surat ash-Shura: 40)

Irritable people cannot be friends with anybody. They cannot love anyone and cannot be loved. They live in continual trouble and sorrow. Because they take everything amiss, they are always lonely.

It is very important for every Muslim to accept that irritability and vexation with others are not in harmony with the morality of the Qur'an.

A Muslim, even when he is in the right, speaks openly to others about matters that upset him; and if he is in the wrong, he corrects his behavior. If somebody else is behaving incorrectly, he is not put out by that person, but instead warns him by reminding him of the verses of the Qur'an.